59 - Being afraid to do it wrong

Today, Emily & Rachel talk about answering a listener question about perfectionism and the idea of doing it wrong.

What you’ll learn from this episode:

• developing confidence for finishing an entire book
• how to learn with all the overwhelming resources out here
• managing the stress of perfectionism

Ready to make readers so in love with your characters they can’t stop biting their nails in anticipation?  Grab The Magic of Character Arcs free email course: https://www.goldenmayediting.com/arcsmagic

Join Tenacious Writing! With the perfect combo of craft, mindset, and community resources, you will build a writing life that feels sustainable, fulfilling, and fun—without any prescriptions or rules. Learn more: https://www.tenaciouswriting.com/

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Transcript

[00:13] Rachel: Hey, writers. Welcome back to Story Magic, the podcast.

[00:16] Emily: That will help you write a book you're damn proud of.

[00:18] Rachel: I'm Rachel.

[00:19] Emily: And I'm Emily.

[00:20] Rachel: And today we are talking about the general sense or the general idea of being afraid to do it wrong. Being afraid to write wrong. I don't know enough. I'm not going to get this right. I have no idea what I'm doing. Kind of all of those fears, all.

[00:37] Emily: Of those roadblocks about.

[00:39] Rachel: Ah, I'm afraid.

[00:41] Emily: Yeah.

[00:42] Rachel: Yeah. So this.

[00:43] Emily: Yeah.

[00:43] Rachel: Fear, fear, fear. Fear of doing it wrong. Fear of failure. This comes from a listener question from Molly. So thank you so much, Molly, for sending this in. We are really excited to talk about it. If you are a listener and you have a specific question or something on your mind that you want us to handle or talk about on the podcast, be sure to email it in to us@infocoldenmayediting.com. And in the subject line, put podcast question. That is exactly what Molly did. And here we are. Today, we're going to talk about her question.

[01:21] Emily: And I just want to. Molly, I just want to send so much love because this question, like, the email that you sent us, is so beautiful because you are so not alone.

[01:31] Rachel: Yeah.

[01:31] Emily: Like, this is. I feel like what we're gonna read, you guys, from what Molly sent us, is just. So every writer starts here, I would say, like, in almost all cases. And so we are. You know, we might give you a little tough love today, but it's coming from a place of, like, I have been here. Rachel has been here. We know so many people have been here. There is a way out. And I'm just so grateful that you sent this to us and so excited to talk about it. Cause, yeah, it's just really exciting. You're starting your romance writing journey. Yay. So, do you wanna read us what Molly sent in?

[02:09] Rachel: Yes. It's kind of a three parter, but they were gonna tackle each one, and they kind of all stem back to being afraid to do it wrong. Listen in. Buckle up. I would love to write my own romance. And I have an idea. But here are my roadblocks. Number one, I've always been a math science person. Never a great writer or ever thought about writing. I have zero confidence when it comes to believe. To believing I can write an entire freaking book. Number two, I'm a major type a perfectionist, and I'm already stressing about getting it right. I keep reminding myself to just get it on the page, but it's easier said than done. Number three, I have zero experience training, et cetera, in writing. I've been listening to all the podcasts, save the cat and story, genius audiobooks, anything and everything, to try and help me understand how to write a compelling story. But there's so much info out there. I read it and then forget everything when it comes time to normal. If you were like, I can just picture a lot of people listening right now being like, that's me. That's me. Because every single one of these three parts, Molly, I was there. I was totally there. Felt that, felt the feelings. And it's learning. Like you said, easier said than done. I think that's what we're going to talk about today. But this part of learning, this is part of the learning process. You learn how to do it, it feels weird, you don't like it, and then you get better at it and it feels less scary. But yes. Which. Where should we start? Actually, can I start? Yes, please. Please.

[03:43] Emily: Because I was just about to say.

[03:44] Rachel: I have like twelve places we can.

[03:46] Emily: Start and I don't know which one, so please go ahead.

[03:48] Rachel: Okay, so we probably are. This is probably going to be a back and forth conversation. Not necessarily like, taking each point by.

[03:57] Emily: I thought you meant between us.

[03:58] Rachel: And I was like, it always is. No, I mean, like, you meant between the questions. Yeah, I mean, like, all of these are wrapped up together, so I don't know that we'll be doing like, n one. Here's our. Yes, our podcast is a conversation. Nice. Okay. Fun times. We're a little out of practice, I guess. Okay, so the first thing I was going to say, molly, you said you've always been a math science person, never a great writer or every thought about writing. I just have to tell everybody. I said the same thing when I was in high school. I wanted to be a trauma surgeon for my entire childhood. Like, that's not even a joke.

[04:44] Emily: Sorry, what?

[04:45] Rachel: Yeah. You didn't know this? Yes. Okay, so instead of watching cartoons, I watched trauma life in the ER. Like, I love medical drama shows. I love medical shows. But, like, the reality shows, like, grey's anatomy is fine, but, like, give me, like, unsolved medical mysteries. Like, that's the shit that I watched growing up. I watched trauma life in the ER. It was my favorite show. And I wanted to be a trauma surgeon so bad. I did. I went to. I went to college for pre med. I started college as a pre medical major in biology. That was my major. I had really big hopes and dreams of going to medical school. I was a math science person, for sure. I never really liked literature, and I'm going to circle back around to that because there's a reason why I didn't like it, and I didn't like it because it made me feel vulnerable, because I was afraid of getting rejected. Math is really easy to like. There is an answer. You get it right or you get it wrong, right? Literature is subjective. Someone approves you, it's different. And even though I couldn't articulate in high school, like, why I leaned towards math and science over literature was because to me, they were black and white. And, like, literature was explained to me how these themes make you feel, and then I will determine what grade you're going to get. You know, like, it felt different, and I felt like it was easier to get better grades in math and science.

[06:22] Emily: So you could control the outcome.

[06:24] Rachel: Yeah. So, anyway, I. Meanwhile, I was, like, a voracious reader. Like, reading a book a day in high school, multiple books a week. Like, my parents would take me to Barnes noble, and, like, I was ruining my parents money because I was reading so many books, right? Like, and I did. I went to college as pre med, and it just felt off. I was like, I don't. Something's just not right. And then I switched to English after my first year, and my parents had, like, a connection. Like, they were so upset. That's a time for another day. My mom also listens to this podcast. So, like, mom, it's okay. We've moved past it. We move past it, mom. But my parents were angry. Like, it felt, like, totally out of left field for me to all of a sudden be like, no, I want to be a writer. But around that time, I had realized, like, that was really what I loved doing, versus, like, math and science, which just felt like a natural fit. Like, I don't know if that makes sense. Anyway, this really long story short, Molly, is, like, just because you might have naturally gravitated to, like, math or science doesn't mean that you can't be a great writer or that they're mutually exclusive. Like, I still consider myself, like, a math and science person, even though now I'm like, literature, literature, give me literature. But that's not the kind of kid that I was, the kind of young adult that I was. And it did take me a long time to move past this same thought and realize, like, oh, I'm allowed to have varying interests that might seem contradictory to one another, but truly aren't. And that you can be a great writer even if you also like math and science. That was really long.

[08:15] Emily: No, I think that's beautiful. No, I really think, because I love the distinction you draw between, like. Yeah, there are those of us who are really sensitive to. I think everybody, to a certain extent, is sensitive to rejection, but some of us are more sensitive than others, and that could be a reason why we are drawn to mental and science sometimes, because there are, you know, quote unquote, right and wrong answers when it comes to math and science. We could have a philosophical debate about that. But, yeah, but I think you all get the point, and I. Yeah, it's beautifully put. It can be. Writing is vulnerable. It just is. And I think, Molly, what I would jump into in answering this kind of, all of these questions at once is this idea that you're a beginner.

[09:08] Rachel: You're a beginner, right.

[09:10] Emily: And there's nothing wrong with being a beginner. I feel like sometimes, like, that phrase, especially when you're an adult, it's like being a beginner at something. It's like, oh, like I'm being infantilized. Right. It's like we want to. We've been told that, like, we're supposed to spend our whole lives practicing for someone to be an expert at it, right? And so deciding later in life, and, like, it's not very late in life for you, I don't think, as it is for us, but it's still late, you know, like, as soon as you hit college. Right. It's late. Yes, quote unquote, to be starting something new. And so there's. And that's just this, like, hustle, culture, societal bullshit of, like, whatever you decide to do when you're five is the thing you're gonna be a genius at when you're older, right. And so, like, just because you did math and science before, that just means that when it comes to writing. And when I say that, I mean, like, writing fiction, right. Because I spent my. A bunch of my career, which was very science focused, but it was also language, nonfiction, communications focused. So I was using words. I was writing. But writing fiction is so different, right? It didn't. And so for, like, I was a total beginner when I came to it, too. And so we have to embrace that beginner mindset, because otherwise, we're just never going to get anywhere. And I think that's where a lot of new writers get stuck, is you're not only trying to do something that's extremely vulnerable, which is write a first draft. Right. No matter who you are, no matter how. Where you are in your writing journey, like, no matter how many books you've put in the world, writing a first draft is extremely vulnerable. It just is. And so not only are you doing that piece of the writing journey, that's always really difficult at an emotional level, but you're also learning a new thing. And, like, that is just, like, so vulnerable.

[10:54] Rachel: It's scary. I'm really bad at it, guys.

[10:56] Emily: Like, really, really bad at it. I am, like, deathly afraid to, like, try to ski because I don't like doing new things. I really, really hate doing things. So I say this, like, also, it doesn't help that, like, I always end up hurting myself. The first time I tried to, I finally was like, I'm gonna mountain bike, you guys. I'm gonna try it. And I had a concussion the first time.

[11:20] Rachel: Yeah.

[11:20] Emily: So, like, it's hard. Doing new things is hard. And, um. And so just you have to give yourself the grace of allowing yourself to have fun. Being a beginner, you know, like, pretend you're seven. What does seven year old you want to do to have fun? Like, trying a new thing. How can you make it fun? Yeah. There's a new member in tenacious writing, and she's just like, I love watching her journey. She's been only been with us for a couple of weeks.

[11:51] Rachel: Yeah.

[11:51] Emily: And she has just embraced this, like, being a beginner, like, diving into a new skill, learning a new thing process. And it's been so fun watching her because she started to dive into our craft resources, but she's taking it really slowly and, like, learning one new thing at a time. And then she's also writing, and she set very manageable goals for herself so that she makes sure she learns how to show up. And she's just learning. She's learning how to build a process that works for her. She's learning how to show up. She's learning how to write her story, and she's having so much fun, and it's so fun to watch her. She's like, I got my 300 words.

[12:26] Rachel: For today, and I really like them.

[12:28] Emily: And I'm having so much fun. And I watched this video, and, like, that's the energy that. That's the energy we want when we're starting new things.

[12:36] Rachel: Yeah, exactly. Like Molly, you said you have zero confidence when it comes to believing that you can write an entire freaking book. It's scary. Like Emily said, and it's also just like, a 1ft in front of the other kind of a thing. And it feels part of me is like, oh, that's such a way to minimize the experience of writing the book. But it's the same way as, like, running a marathon. Like, how do you run a marathon? You just put 1ft in front of the other and eventually you get there. That is. I am positive, Molly, you've probably heard that, and it feels over simple than, like, what it actually is. But that's really what it actually is, is like, it's literally one word at a time, one day at a time. Hot take. Sure.

[13:23] Emily: Hot take.

[13:23] Rachel: Yeah. Like, of course you have zero confidence.

[13:26] Emily: You've never done it.

[13:26] Rachel: Yeah. You've never done it before. Like. Like, is that. Is that over? I don't. It's not a bad thing.

[13:32] Emily: Wrong to say, but, like, yeah, you have zero confidence in it. Cause you've never done it before. And so the confidence isn't, can you write a freaking, entire freaking book? The question you maybe could ask yourself instead is like, can I show up every week? Right? Can I show up to work on my book every week? And if the answer is yes, then you will end up with an entire freaking book, right?

[13:55] Rachel: Like.

[13:56] Emily: Like, the question is not like, we try to reach for these long goals. Like, can I run?

[14:00] Rachel: Yeah, a marathon.

[14:02] Emily: A marathon. Well, have you run a five k?

[14:04] Rachel: You know, like, why.

[14:07] Emily: Why do we. Like, have you run in the last three months?

[14:11] Rachel: You know what I mean?

[14:13] Emily: That's the question I'm asking myself. But we focus so much on this output, on the entire freaking book, on the marathon, versus. Are you doing the thing every day? If I run every day a couple miles and increase my miles every week, eventually I will get to a marathon. Same with a book. If you put words on the page every week, it, like, it doesn't matter how many words, as long as you're putting words on the page, you'll get there.

[14:42] Rachel: Yes. Yeah. It's really, like. I also think part of hustle culture tells us that you do have to aim for these, like, really, really big goals and that you have to do it really fast. Like, especially now in the learning. In the learning process. Like, it probably won't feel fast, and it probably feels really overwhelming. Like Emily said, you've never done it before, but there's all of this out there that's like, you have to do this. The thing is writing the book, and it's like, well, no, the thing is, like, writing a scene, writing a paragraph. Like, that's the thing for you right now, is like, let's write a paragraph. How did that go? Cool. I did it. Let's do it again. And then you add it.

[15:27] Emily: Feel.

[15:29] Rachel: Yeah, yeah. Smaller. Smaller things.

[15:34] Emily: Zoom. Zoom in. Zoom in.

[15:38] Rachel: Zoom in.

[15:38] Emily: Zoom out.

[15:39] Rachel: Zoom somehow.

[15:41] Emily: Zoom. Zoom.

[15:45] Rachel: So, okay, so let's jump to this part.

[15:48] Emily: Molly, you said I'm a major type a perfectionist, and I'm already stressing about getting it right. So, first off, kudos to you. You know that about yourself.

[15:59] Rachel: Yeah.

[16:00] Emily: That's big. That's huge. And I'm assuming that because you actually told us that you listened to our podcast episode about this, so, you know, there's no such thing as right and wrong when it comes to art. There just isn't. There's. There's what you want your book eventually to look like. Right? The vision that you have for your book and every decision that you make is working towards getting you there. But there's no right. There's no wrong. And that can be really hard, especially when we're starting new things, because we want to be like, am I doing it right? Am I learning it right? And so the first thing that I would do is just keep working on paying attention to what your brain is telling you and rewriting those narratives. And we have tons of resources on this in tenacious writing because it's not that simple.

[16:53] Rachel: Yeah.

[16:57] Emily: Learning to identify and work with and manage your perfectionism is a lifelong journey, I would say. And the first step is to start to understand what your perfection inner perfectionist voices are saying. I actually just did an Instagram live about this a few weeks ago. By the time this came out, it'll be a few weeks ago. So you could go check that out, because I have a couple actionable steps that you can take to start to work through perfectionism issues. But the first one is to. You got to know what your unique internal voice is saying. And so writing it down, externalizing it, either writing it down, speaking it to a friend, to a voice app, but getting it out of your head, into the world where you can look at it, is the first way that I would do that. So whenever you start to, like, stress about getting it right, like, speak your stresses and learn, like, exactly what are you saying? What. Exactly what are you afraid of? Exactly what is it that you're trying to get right? Because once you have that awareness of what your inner voices are saying, that's when you can start to rewrite them or love on them or. Or figure out ways to work through them. And again, go check out that ig live. And then if you want to join whoever's listening, if you guys want more resources on how to do that, we have master classes, workshops. We regularly talk about this in tenacious writing because it's so. It's so important, and it's such a. Just a ongoing process.

[18:28] Rachel: Yes. I was thinking the same thing about, like, getting to the heart of that stress. Because, Molly, as you type this, you said I'm a perfectionist and already stressing about it. But if you're. That is a fee only physical reaction that you're probably experiencing. But what is behind that feeling? Like, Emily just said, so for one of my one on one clients, experiencing the same stress, like, I'm so overwhelmed. I'm so stressed, I can't get the scene down. I feel paralyzed.

[18:57] Emily: And.

[18:58] Rachel: And, like, the more that we talked about what was behind it, it came down to, like, if I don't get it right, I am wasting time. And if I waste time, I will never finish. And if I never finish, I am not good enough. Like, it just followed this thought trail that kind of resulted in this really deep fear. And that's what perfectionism is. It's trying to protect you from that deep fear by providing what appears to be safety. It's not safety. It's a false kind of safety. But what is that stress? What's behind that stress? Is it that you're. If you write those words and they are not good, what are the consequences? You know? Like, that's another question I would be asking yourself is, like, you're already stressing about getting it right. What if you get it wrong?

[19:50] Emily: Yeah.

[19:51] Rachel: What happens?

[19:52] Emily: And, like, allow it to be irrational.

[19:54] Rachel: Because it's probably irrational.

[19:57] Emily: And that's the point, right? Once you start to externalize it and really look at what happens, what are you afraid of happening if you get it wrong? Then you can start to see, like, oh, my inner perfectionist is trying to keep me safe, but it's really just getting in my way. Cause I don't need to be protected from some of these things.

[20:14] Rachel: Yeah. Yeah. I used to, like, when I was trying to figure out how to play through this. And, I mean, that in the sense of, like, perfectionism is very serious to me. Like, it shows up for me as female, very serious. I have to get it right. I feel very serious about that. And then I was like, okay, but what if I just, like, played with it? What if I just, like, played to have fun? And then I would ask myself, like, what are the consequences of doing it bad? And then be like, cool. I'm gonna. I want those to happen. And, like, all right, let me, like, play with the worst paragraph I've ever written and then write something terrible and look back at it and be like, oh, I guess that was fine. And now I have 300 words. You know, like, I would again, like we were saying earlier, like, approach this from a really playful perspective, from a really, like, okay, you know, what if the worst thing did happen? Or, like, if I sat down right now and I was thinking on the page, or I'm, like, sitting down at my computer, my perfectionism is telling me whatever. Whatever narrative. Like, okay, how can I play through that? How could I, like, have fun through that? And what kind of joviality or, like, lightheartedness could I bring right now? Do I want to, like, put on some music or do I want to go for a walk or do I want to, like, talk out loud? The fears that I'm feeling, you know, just don't treat it so serious. It feels so serious. But maybe you could play with the idea of it not being serious and try that on. That's another thing that is kind of easier said than done, but it worked for me as a beginning step. Can I try on not so serious right now? Like, maybe I can do a performance. Can I perform and pretend that I'm not upset?

[22:07] Emily: Well, and that's the other thing is, like, we. We so often treat, like, learning a new thing. Like, it's this academic pursuit. And I think this comes down to your last question, too, about, like, trying to consume all the craft resources. Then you're worried that you're not going to. You're going to forget it when it takes time to use it, right? I think that's probably if I were to venture, I guess, and I could be wrong. But for me, this obsession with learning and getting craft right always came from, like, a school thing, right? Like, you would learn something and then you would have to perform it, you know, to a graded standard, right? You're just writing a fiction novel, you know, like, you get to decide what learning looks like for you, and you get to decide, you know, how much you want to learn before you get started. And that's listening to you talk about playfulness and fun. Rachel made me think of that tenacious writing member that I was talking about earlier, who. It's been really fun watching her dip her toes into everything. She came to an open coaching call that I led in tenacious writing. We have regular open coaching calls where anyone can come and just kind of talk about what their. They're going through. And she had just joined, and she was like, I don't know where to get started. I don't even know. Like, it's all so overwhelming. And I had. I think everyone else on the call was, like, a seasoned writer in the sense that they've been writing for a really long time. And I was you, I would do anything to be where you are again.

[23:36] Rachel: Yeah. Right.

[23:37] Emily: Have the opportunity, especially within tenacious writing.

[23:40] Rachel: Right.

[23:41] Emily: With all those anti hustle resources at your disposal, like, you, for anyone out there who's. Who's just getting started with writing and feels overwhelmed by everything they have to learn and how much they don't know about their process and what they want to write and their story, you are actually in a really, really beautiful place where you're not mired in all kinds of bad habits. So many tenacious writers, so many folks come into tenacious writing with years of trying to write and, like, getting themselves into these patterns and narratives and internal dialogues and, like, they just have all these things to work through, which is fine if you're in that place. Come join us. We're doing that, too, all the time.

[24:24] Rachel: I love when we get new writers.

[24:26] Emily: Who, like, aren't mired in that yet, at least within their writing sphere.

[24:29] Rachel: Right. That's.

[24:30] Emily: That's a safe space, a protected space that isn't, you know, hasn't been predetermined by all the other hustle crap that's out there.

[24:39] Rachel: Like, you get to play.

[24:41] Emily: You get to play with your story, with your craft. You get to play with your process. You get to play with, like, mindset work, right? And start figuring out which things work for you based on what you want, how you work, right? How you want to show up the pace that you want to write. Like, without all of the shoulds of what a writing life should look like, what the world tells you it should look like. You get to decide, and you get to build that. So I would just encourage you look at it as an opportunity to have a lot of fun. And, like Rachel said, that could be sound oversimplified, but I think sometimes that reframe can help. It doesn't have to be so serious. You're not in a class. You're not getting graded. Like, you get to decide what this looks like.

[25:22] Rachel: Yes. I feel like I have this conversation at least two or three times a month with my one on one clients because we do give them assignments, and then they, like, turn them into us, and it feels even the same way as, like, oh, no, I have to turn it in, and it has to be right so I can get a good grade on it. And you're like, that's not how any of this works.

[25:42] Emily: Yeah, this works.

[25:43] Rachel: It's just for. It's. You want to do this because you have a deep desire to do it. You, like, Molly, you said to us, I would love, in all caps, love to write my own romance. Like, you want to do it, and no one is going to be, like, over your shoulder, judging you. And if that is happening, you're in the wrong spot, because that's not how. That's not how writers should be treated. That's not the attitude of vulnerable art. Like, if you are a writer that's listening to this and being like, no, people are over my shoulder, judging me, I'd be like, maybe find a different space because we don't think that's healthy. But, like, I do. However, Molly, fully understand what you're saying with, like, I read it and then forget it when it comes time to use it. I feel like that was the first four or five years of my writing life. Like, honestly, like, even. Even in doing book coach work, there were times where I was like, I get this, and I get it in other people, but I don't get it in me. And, like, that's a weird spot to be in, to be like, yeah, I understand what save the cat is saying, but, like, on my pages, uh uh. Doesn't make any sense. And I think in that case, it's time. It's time and it's process, and it's making craft work for you, because for me, it was like, I needed to internalize the theory of how this all worked a lot before I could apply it to my own stuff. But that didn't mean I didn't write in the meantime. Like, I was experimenting. I was trying it out. I was trying to learn. But it did feel like that of, like, is this making any sense at all? You know? And it just takes time to learn it and internalize it. Your brain is going to be different than mine or Emily's or anybody else's. And I also think I noticed a really big level up in my critical understanding of, like, writing craft theory when Emily and I started to learn it together. And, like, when I was learning it or when I was putting it in practice with my clients or when I was working with, like, a writing partner in tenacious writing. Like, some of this stuff is really hard to do by yourself. Like, you're so laser focused into the words that you're writing that of course, it's tough to see, like, the craft you're applying, you know? So give, again, big theme give yourself a little bit more grace here and, like, treat it like play, treat it like experimenting. Find, I don't know, writing partner that you can bounce ideas off of or that is also learning craft the same way that you are and talk about it and, like, you know, work through these theories that you're learning and try to make sense of. Is this, you know, does this idea of the story point make sense to me as a theory? And then, like, one step later, how do I see it showing up in my characters? And then one step later, how do I see it showing up on the page? Like, there's just so much interconnectedness of craft and then structure and character and plot and writing that, like, you're not going to see it immediately. It's not possible. It does take time. And then you have revisions, and, like, then you revise, and then you kind of. That's where you really put this stuff into practice.

[29:16] Emily: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think. And that can be really discouraging to hear. I think sometimes, like, this. Like, no, no, no.

[29:24] Rachel: Because you're.

[29:25] Emily: It's 100% right.

[29:26] Rachel: Yeah. Like, it does.

[29:27] Emily: It takes time. And I think if you like. I just know that when people used to say that, I was like, oh, I know. I want it to take time. I'm gonna have my debut novel out in this month, this year, and, like, you know, like, all those things, and it's like, no, Emily, you don't know anything because. Because you. When we focus on the end goals and this comes back to what we were talking about earlier with, like, zooming the one way or the other, but, like, if you focus on those outcomes, you're not going to make any progress because it's so overwhelming. Like, focus on the day to day. Like, like, you would love to write your own romance. I am going to venture to guess that you would love to have a romance written, right. But you also would love to go through the process of putting a story on the page where people fall in love. Right. And, like, building characters who are, like, meant to fall in love together and, like, going through that journey. Like, focus on the journey of bringing that book to life and, like. And all the fun that can be had with that versus the entire freaking book.

[30:31] Rachel: Yes, exactly.

[30:32] Emily: And that will get you, like, you will get there, and you'll get there faster than you think if you focus on the day to day, on the process versus, like, what I used to do, which was, like, come up with, well, if I write this many words and this day I'll have an agent and publish and everything will be. I'll be perfect in six months.

[30:52] Rachel: Yeah, I mean, it doesn't work like that. And, like, another hot take is that learning craft doesn't mean that you're going to write a perfect first draft. Learning craft doesn't mean that this is going to be any easier to get words down on the page. Learning craft does not equal an entire freaking book. Like, it's not the end all solution. Craft is a tool. We talk about this a lot on the podcast. It's a tool that helps you understand how story works, which is a benefit to you showing up to write, but, like, it is not a solution to your perfectionism. Learning craft won't make you feel, like, confident the moment you sit down to write. It is a practice, like, writing practice that you have to continually do. And I feel like I'm in a spot now where I can say, like, yeah, it's easier. Like, craft is an innate part of my writing knowledge now, but even now, I still am like, oh, shit, I need an all is lost moment. What? I don't know what that would be, you know? But, like, even then, it can get in the way.

[31:53] Emily: Like, right now, I'm. The more I focus on craft, the less I can get done. And I'm a plotter, right?

[31:58] Rachel: And, like, I'm writing a first draft.

[32:00] Emily: And, like, to a certain extent, I just have to get it written. And I think that's true. No matter. Like, that can be true. No matter where you are on the. On your journey with a story or on your learning journey is like, you just have to get words down.

[32:13] Rachel: Molly. Yep.

[32:15] Emily: And, like, they're not if you forget everything when the time comes. Whatever. Have fun writing a kissing scene or, you know, your character's backstory or, like, banter on the page.

[32:25] Rachel: Right?

[32:25] Emily: Like, that will get you where you want to go. If you're having fun with it and you're enjoying the scenes that are on the page, just get that first draft out, and then you can apply all the craft things. Right, like, to your heart. But if it's keeping you from putting words on the page, then it's. It's in the way.

[32:42] Rachel: Yep. So get that roadblock out of the way. And we have. We have full confidence in you that this is possible. Even though it's hard to feel that yourself. We know that you can do it. Anybody out there?

[32:55] Emily: It would be such a beautiful, fun, fulfilling process if you let it be from day one. From day one, yeah. Awesome. Thank you so much, Molly, for submitting this question and if anybody else wants to submit a question for us to answer, we answer all of them. So if you would like us to do a podcast about your challenge or question or whatever thoughts you have about writing, they do not have to be that coherent. Usually we can get to the heart of it. Just send us an email infocoldenmayediting.com with the subject line podcast question and we.

[33:32] Rachel: Will get to it. Awesome. Thank you.

[33:34] Emily: If you want to build a successful, fulfilling, and sustainable writing life that works for you, you've got to get on our email list.

[33:40] Rachel: Sign up now to get our free email course. The magic of character arcs after seven days of email Magic, you'll have the power to keep your readers flipping pages all through the night.

[33:49] Emily: Link in the show notes. We'll see you there.

[33:51] Rachel: Thank you.